So, my tutorials are start at 10 a.m. on Mondays, and last for one hour. Alas, at 8.30 a.m. this morning I was still wide awake, so I took the decision to alter my alarm to 2 p.m. – the time I need to arise for work, and skip the tutorial altogether. It’s only my second tutorial of the unit, but what could I do? I have to drive to work for 1.5 hours and, at midnight, drive home again. If I hadn’t fallen asleep before the tutorial, I would have only had 3 hours sleep since 2 p.m. on Sunday, assuming I was able to get to sleep after the tutorial that is. At 8.30 this morning, it didn’t seem like I had any guaranteed sleep coming my way.
I am averaging less than 6 hours a night, or less now. I’m wondering just how big an impact it is having on my current IBD issues. I feel shattered all the time, and then when I do get to bed (between 2 and 3 a.m.) I just don’t sleep. I lie there, unable to keep my eyes open, but I just don’t sleep. Even when I try to catch up on sleep over the weekend like I used to, I only manage around 6 hours. It’s so frustrating.
I wonder how much more of an impact this IBD can have on my life. I received the disabled, student, information form from my college today, and it struck me that I fit more than one of the criteria now. It’s funny how I never thought of myself as disabled until a few years ago, when I realised just how much different my life is from others without a visible chronic illness, or disability. I guess it all came on so gradually. You adjust to one small problem, then the next and, pretty soon, those small problems add up to some rather major adjustments/compromises.