No tutorial for me

So, my tutorials are start at 10 a.m. on Mondays, and last for one hour.  Alas, at 8.30 a.m. this morning I was still wide awake, so I took the decision to alter my alarm to 2 p.m. – the time I need to arise for work, and skip the tutorial altogether.   It’s only my second tutorial of the unit, but what could I do?   I have to drive to work for 1.5 hours and, at midnight, drive home again.   If I hadn’t fallen asleep before the tutorial, I would have only had 3 hours sleep since 2 p.m. on Sunday, assuming I was able to get to sleep after the tutorial that is.  At 8.30 this morning, it didn’t seem like I had any guaranteed sleep coming my way.

I am averaging less than 6 hours a night, or less now.   I’m wondering just how big an impact it is having on my current IBD issues.   I feel shattered all the time, and then when I do get to bed (between 2 and 3 a.m.) I just don’t sleep.  I lie there, unable to keep my eyes open, but I just don’t sleep.  Even when I try to catch up on sleep over the weekend like I used to, I only manage around 6 hours.  It’s so frustrating.

I wonder how much more of an impact this IBD can have on my life.   I received the disabled, student, information form from my college today, and it struck me that I fit more than one of the criteria now.  It’s funny how I never thought of myself as disabled until a few years ago, when I realised just how much different my life is from others without a visible chronic illness, or disability.   I guess it all came on so gradually.  You adjust to one small problem, then the next and, pretty soon, those small problems add up to some rather major adjustments/compromises.

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