Yesterday was a day of two parts: started off well, but ended badly.
I had an appointment with the hairdresser to have my (ever-increasing in number) grey covered, and to have a haircut. It has been just over 7 months since my last haircut, and October 2012 since dye had been applied. I woke up, not feeling so great, and wondered if I could make it through such an epic session. Four hours later, with hair dyed and cut, looking pretty good, but … I was so very tired. Shattered. Exhausted. My eyes were dry and wanted to shut, but I had to drive to work, and do my shift.
Then, I received a text informing me I had an appointment today – an appointment that would require another early start. I had totally forgotten the appointment, and was annoyed I had set myself up for three days in a row of reduced sleep.
I arrived at work and, before I could even start, I found an email informing me of changes. Ordinarily, I would have fumed (silently) or just thought: “Meh. Yet another example of why I want to leave“. But, I was tired, and fed up, and so I took umbrage, and, rather unfortunately let my mood colour my interactions with a colleague; a colleague who was least deserving of it. By the time I arrived home, and crawled into bed, I realised my behaviour had been abhorrent, and, at the very least, unprofessional. I felt ashamed of myself. Just because I was tired, in physical pain, and fed up I should not have let that interfere with my performance on the job.
When I woke today, still exhausted, I debated whether or not to go into work. I was still so very tired. I made it to the appointment on time, at least, despite protestation from my internal system, and made it through the appointment, but I really could not keep up with the chatter as I yawned my way through. In the end, I realised I had to go into work, if only to apologise to my colleague. Said colleague was very understanding, much to my relief.
Now, as I write this up, I beginning to think I ought to take this Friday as a day’s holiday, because I just don’t think I will make it to the end of the week. These days, I spend the weekends catching up on sleep, and napping – a lot. I think I really need a long rest. A very long rest. If not for my sake, for the sake of others.